not all who wander are lost.

not all who wander are lost .....and not all who are lost wander.

things are moving real fast. I had my first simCAT today. I did well in the Verbal Analysis/Reading Comprehension section and screwed up the Data interpretation section. Well, so i probably wont make it to the top tier this simCAT ....did i hear someone say ......NEXT !!!
the next simCAT's on the 18th of Sep ... i'm gonna crack the exam big time ! ;) hopefully !

I have to submit my Curriculum Vitae for a company that is coming for recruitment in december - and joining a company is the last thing on my mind just now. I mean i really dont see myself working in a company after a year implementing an interface for a mechanical engineering software designed by some dude sitting in korea ! (well i'm not sure thats what the job profile will be but whatever ! )

Then again, on second thoughts I really dont know what I want to do. I mean, its not that i am lost.....its more like i'm wandering about. Actually I know what I would be most happy doing - getting together with a few really, incredibly smart people who are not afraid to dream big and start with our own company - and its not cause a dude called bill gates did it and became the richest man in the world - i mean everyway you look at it its awesome. You work for YOUR company, you work with friends as crazy as you, the thrill of working together for a dream - a dream that noone except you can see and believing in it enough to put your careeer at stake on it , it all sounds so romantically ideal. But then again, what if the company is not a success ?? I've thought quite a bit about it and i am quite sure that the thing i am afraid is not whether the company will do well or not - somewhere deep inside i am extremely convinced ultimately we'll do well. What i am afraid is defying what is expected of me and breaking away. I mean everyone from my parents, to friends, to professors, to the poster on the wall in my room expects me to head off for an M.S./PhD, or make it to an IIM (indian institute of management) or get some cool job (of course cool here means diff things to diff people).

Again my greatest fear is not that i will not do what i want to just now....its what happens years down the line when i've actually settled into a career too far to do something maverick. If i dont really find my work to be my passion then i know that i will regret not having done what i wanted throughout life.
Reminds me of a cool pickup scene in "Before Sunrise" :
The guy wants to convince a girl he met ten minutes before to get down the train she is on and spend the evening with him so he goes something like :
imagine your life 20 years from now....you are married and your life doesnt quite have that "spark" it used to and everything is really dull ! then you'll be dreaming of all those guys you met along the years whom you could have dated but didnt and wondering what it would be like if you did date him ;) .I'm just one of those guys ....so do yourself a favour and save yourself from the regret twenty years down the line. The girl got off the train.......will I ?












Comments

Anonymous said…
in case u decide 2 get off the train buzz me....;)
i've an idea...it's fuzzy but hardcore designer....
3:12 PM
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